cgi wankfest.

I just got back from seeing Transformers 2 revenge of the sith or whatever the fuck it is called.

I have never in my life seen a movie so devoid of any real meaningful or eventful plot in my entire life. Hundreds of millions of dollars of cgi (which is fantastic looking) cannot keep me entertained for nearly 3 fucking hours. That is a joke.

here is a quick summary:

Good:
- Fantastic effects, robots pummeling each other. Megan Fox is purely eye candy

Bad:
- was written by either mentally handicapped children or Michael Bay himself. Seriously. I think they wrote this script in a few weeks after the first one just because they knew they could. I would provide specific examples, but my brain is still liquid after sitting through this shit.

-Far too many attempts at humor which are NOT funny in the least. Hey guys let's have two "black" robots and make them loud and obnoxious! wow are they WILD and CRAZY let's have them say countless stereotypical lines that are not in anyway funny. THAT IS BRILLIANT.

- Typical Michael bay direction including pointless explosions, vehicles flipping around, constant tight shots, rotating cameras and so on. Go back to directing commercials you fuck face. You are ALL played out style and NO substance.

- Too fucking long. And this means something because I hardly ever complain about the runtime of a film. You are making a movie about robots who transform. It does not in any way need to be 2.5 hours long.

And NO, I didn't go into it expecting a masterpiece, so don't even start with that shit.

This a fluffy summer popcorn film, I GET that...what I don't get are the countless people who see this as more than that (and in fact try to TELL me it is "amazing")

This whole rant is being written because of how huge this film will be and how it deserves absolutely none of the money it will make. I am SICK of these "block busters" that we are all supposed to get boners for. It is fucking absurd.

This applies to all the comic book cartoon movies as well. I hate asking someone which films they are looking forward to and getting a list that is 90% shit based off of a comic or cartoon. There are obvious exceptions, but for the most part, people need to just stop.

"wait a minute, Dan" you might be saying "didn't you say you enjoyed the first Transformers film?"

I did originally write here that it was a good movie. This was after seeing it for the first time and buying into the hype. I wanted a Transformers movie to work and be good.

I've tried watching it again on DVD, I got through it a second time, just barely. To me a great film allows itself to be watched several times over. It allows you to discover its smaller details and in turn love it more as a whole.

These movies are not that. Not even close.

I wonder how a different director, given the same hundreds of millions would handle such a film. But I don't wonder for too long, because I think it is painfully obvious now that this "franchise" was never really meant for this.

Unless you are 12 years old or possess the mentality of one, you brain will probably also turn to liquid upon watching this.

And I am not talking about suspending your belief and just going for a ride. I can and have done that a million times.... This is different. This movie was actually BAD and doesn't even warrant you trying to wrap your head around its horeshit.

This is

An absolutely perfect blend of amazing music and amazing images.

Hammock: Mono No Aware from Hammock Music on Vimeo.

It makes me feel right.

I don't know. titles are overrated.

Sometimes I question why this blog exists. I really do.

I go back and look at the things I wrote in here and I wonder why I ever felt compelled to do so.

I'm guessing we've all felt like this from time to time, though.

Truth is there is no real reason I do this. I guess I do because of the few friends who read it. It is a decent way of talking about trivial things and then giving you the option to read it or skip it if you like.

I simply don't care. I think I could just delete this blog and write all my thoughts down on a pad of paper to keep them private and it would have the same feel.

I guess it comes down to boredom a lot of the time. It's not bad to just ramble on and on sometimes, and this makes it very easy.

I like sharing things with people though, even movie/game "reviews" that none of you give a shit about. It's cool, and I'll probably keep on doing it.

It just hits me as strange sometimes.

Anway.

On with the random:

Shiny

I got a new visor off of Ebay for a good price and I think it looks pretty slick. Better than the clear. It's actually not so dark when looking through, but should still offer decent glare protection.

Plus now I can stare at people and they won't really know it. Also I could rob a bank.

Riding at night might be shit, but we shall see.

Bonus pic:

It makes things look longer than they are. PENIS JOKE.

I'm off for a nap.

And away.

WELL.

I got my yearly haircut on Tuesday and I am loving the way it feels.

Here's the thing about me.

I cannot really remember a time when I've actually given a fuck what my hair looks like. I say this with 100% honesty.

To me, hair is something that grows out of my head and serves no real purpose.

The only reason I let my hair grow long is simply because it is easier to just NOT get it cut than it is to "maintain" it in anyway.

So I cut it every so often. Usually in the summer because summer = Heat. you know?

And so, not giving a shit, as I often do...I really, really don't understand how this simple act is such a big deal to the people I know/work with/whatever.

No, I will not lift my hat to show you my fucking hair. you know what is under this hat? more fucking hair.

Hey, it's brown just like the hair you can see even with my hat on!

Guess what? it looks pretty much the same as it did last time I got it cut!

Your gasps and comments about how I finally got a haircut are not necessary. It is not an event. There will be no fucking parade.

it is HAIR. it grows. sometimes it is long. Sometimes it is short. I don't give a fuck about it and never have.

No, I will not post new photos on my facebook page of my fucking hair. Are you fucking insane?

Shut the fuck up already and get over it.

END RANT.

Music is so good.

I started listening to some music today. Felt like I was sick of everything, so I put it on random.

When it started playing some At the Drive-in I had to take it off random because I had forgotten how fucking incredible this band was.

I listened to them exclusively for a long period of time when I first found out about them...But really haven't listened in years for whatever reason.

You know how certain songs bring back memories and such upon listening? I would say their album Relationship of command does this to an extreme degree.

So much so, that I sit here writing this and have to pause and think for a few minutes to just remember. it's quite incredible how these things happen. I am feeling very off at the moment, but I like it.

I can't count the number of times I listened to that CD. Back when I actually had a CD player in my room in place of a computer.

I know it isn't for everyone. I'm pretty sure it took a bit of time for the band to grow on me, but man did they ever.

I remember Trevor and I arguing about their awesomeness back in the day. I recall Trevor telling me they were shit because they didn't have good “riffs” I also recall wanting to punch him in his mouth.

It is just an incredible mix of strange guitar, tempos and nonsensical lyrics and I think it's fucking brilliant and always will be.

Also, Afros:

YOSHIMURA GOOOOOOOO

I finally got my bike back today and rode it home in the cold and the rain and the wind, but it was worth it.

I walked in there and all the guys were talking about how much I was going to like it and how good it sounded and blah blah blah.

“Jason was back there revving it up when he was done and I had to go see because I couldn't believe it was an F...it sounds waaay beefier”

and indeed it does.

look at Emily and her sweet new accessory.

Once you get to about 5K in the RPMS the thing really screams and I love it. The bike is also noticeably more responsive throttle wise which is fantastic.

I think that's pretty much the best sound you're going to get out of the ol' GS engine and I am very happy with how it turned out.

It sounds less like an angry lawn mower and more like a...wait, maybe it still sounds like an angry lawn mower...just even more LIVID and loud with a bit of growl to it. Something that I really enjoy.

Then as I was putting my helmet on some dude came over and asked if I put a pipe on it, then stood there to watch as I started it up since he'd never seen someone pipe a GS.

So I started it and revved her up and he smiled THEN reached over and revved it himself and I thought about striking him. I think he worked there though and was just curious, then he told me to enjoy and then walked away.

ANYWAY, glad to have it back and sounding and riding better than ever, WOOO.

Ps. I had recorded a quick video so as to show off the sound but my internet connection has been absolutely shit the past few days and I am having trouble getting it to upload...so maybe some other time. I'm not in the mood to fight with it anymore.

PPS. I wrote this post earlier in the day but am posting it now and just want to say it was fantastic seeing Geoff again and "Drag me to hell" was surprisingly enjoyable. You know, in that it is pretty much Evil Dead with all its goofy gross shit. It's about Time Sam Raimi, you fuck.

And goodnight.