man.

Well sir,

Tonight I went out and did something for the first time in 4 weeks or so.

Trevor and I went and saw Video games live. The Edmonton Symphony Orchestra and a choir performing music from various games.

Honest to god I have never seen/heard something as amazing as that. The energy and awesomeness was extraordinary.

Even the music from games I really don't care about was incredible. It really makes you realize that games, and game music aren't just for kids anymore, of course anyone who plays games regularly can tell you that, but there's still a thought out there that game music is just blips and beeps and it's not true. It's just as real and takes as much skill to compose and everything else.

So I'm feeling like shit and tired as hell, but it was worth it because that was fucking awesome.

Goodnight moon.

Winter nights.

Well sir.

Two Chest X-rays and two blood tests later, all for no reason, I think (fingers crossed) I am officially on the road to feeling better. Then again, last week I had a few good days only to sink right down to the bottom on my days off from work.

Anyway. I hope. Because for the past three weeks or whatever I've felt like something far less than alive, but just slightly above dead.

I have a dentist appointment on Wednesday, my first in a long, long time. As I told Stephanie I'm kind of treating this as a opportunity to get myself all checked out and patched up if possible. I think I'll be getting my eyes looked at sometime this week as well.

I'm also trying to eat better/more/healthier. I don't mean I'm going all health food crazy...But looking at my usual diet would be enough to scare most people and so I've taken to just making an active effort to be more considerate to myself.

On top of all that, I feel that working nights isn't exactly helping anything either. I've heard so much about how it can fuck with people and actually take years away from lives, so after I get my $1000 bonus I think I'll be cutting loose. Finally.

I have no idea what I'll be doing after that. It really doesn't matter at this point. I just need a change. Maybe I'll save the money I make from here until then and finally take a real vacation to somewhere far, far away from all of this and figure it out when I get back.

In other news a few weeks ago I was trying to use my debit card and got some strange message at not one but three ATM machines. I eventually phoned the bank and was told that my card had been swiped through one of those card copiers and that my card may or may not have actually been duplicated, so as a security measure they froze the account.

That's all fine and dandy, and in the end probably saved me having my money stolen, but I had to go and get a new card with a new number and that was a bit of a hassle. I guess I'm lucky the cops actually check those things when they find them and alert the banks of which account numbers were potentially stolen. None of my money was gone.

Dirty bastards. I'll stick to using cash whenever possible I guess.

I would have sex with a cyborg woman.

well, time for some news about stuff that is pretty unimportant.

I'm still feeling like shit. I spent my three days off including new years laying on the couch watching movies and TV. I have had absolutely no will to do anything else. I can't even force myself to sit in front of this computer for more than 20 minutes at a time, if at all.

I feel better this morning though. I think, and I have an appointment to see the doctor tomorrow for one last check up before I just give up and accept the fact that I'll feel like shit forever.

I just feel so...disconnected and dead and I don't really give a shit about anything lately. It's so strange.

Anyway sorry for ignoring Trevor/Ryan on Monday. But I just couldn't be bothered. Hopefully this week we can all do something, finally?

In other news I got a new Cell phone, finally.

I'm not a phone type of guy, and never will be. (as in, I usually hate talking) but finally being able to send/recieve text messages is cool. and having a camera with me wherever I go and not having to look like a tourist/peter parker/douche bag is pretty cool.

Now I can take and post completely stupid and random pictures like....

This:



sure he looks like a lazy cunt, but he's actually holding that pallet up. Once he started asking for help I decided to just take a picture and walk away. I don't know if it fell over or not. Probably, but what do I care. it was quitting time for me.

And this:


Art, the crazy janitor who I really, really like to bug. Ryan and I used to make fun of his wife until we found out she was crippled or some shit. then we felt bad. he's still fun to bug though.

I believe that when I took this photo I was explaining to him that he's old and washed up.

PS. I fucked his wife.