I've seen the dark side.
Brothers and sisters, I did the unthinkable. I purchased an Uwe Boll film.
Hear me out!
I know what a douchebag the guy is, but I've heard so many awful thinks about Bloodrayne that I had to see it. I'm a movie fanatic, and to me, bad films are like driving past a horrific accident on a highway. You slow down and you look, even though you know you shouldn't.
I had to see how bad it was. And let me tell you, it's pretty fucking bad. One thing the man does right is that he keeps the blood flowing. Nothin' wrong with that, but the acting is atrocious as is the editing and the whole thing just has the production value of a television show.
So I watched Kristanna Loken run around in her tight top and low pants for an hour and half slicing and dicing people with her fake looking arm blades and biting people (hawt). Oh, he threw in a pointless sex scene too. So in other words, something was done right.
another reason I got it is because it comes with a complete version of Bloodrayne 2 for the PC, which is actually a solid game. I guess they had to toss that in the sweeten the deal.
If anyone wants to witness the horror I just did, don't buy this movie, don't even rent it. Just ask me and I shall give it to you. Or if you can't stand owning it, I'll just lend it to you.
It's fun watching every possible thing done wrong in a movie. At least for me it is. Just terrible, I'll never understand how he got these people to star in this crapfest.
I guess money does talk.
Hey, at least it's better than house of the dead.
barely
Hear me out!
I know what a douchebag the guy is, but I've heard so many awful thinks about Bloodrayne that I had to see it. I'm a movie fanatic, and to me, bad films are like driving past a horrific accident on a highway. You slow down and you look, even though you know you shouldn't.
I had to see how bad it was. And let me tell you, it's pretty fucking bad. One thing the man does right is that he keeps the blood flowing. Nothin' wrong with that, but the acting is atrocious as is the editing and the whole thing just has the production value of a television show.
So I watched Kristanna Loken run around in her tight top and low pants for an hour and half slicing and dicing people with her fake looking arm blades and biting people (hawt). Oh, he threw in a pointless sex scene too. So in other words, something was done right.
another reason I got it is because it comes with a complete version of Bloodrayne 2 for the PC, which is actually a solid game. I guess they had to toss that in the sweeten the deal.
If anyone wants to witness the horror I just did, don't buy this movie, don't even rent it. Just ask me and I shall give it to you. Or if you can't stand owning it, I'll just lend it to you.
It's fun watching every possible thing done wrong in a movie. At least for me it is. Just terrible, I'll never understand how he got these people to star in this crapfest.
I guess money does talk.
Hey, at least it's better than house of the dead.
barely
posted by D. at 5:15 a.m.
1 Comments:
Hahah I rented it for free from Rogers, it’s so bad I didn’t even want to blog about it.
“It's fun watching every possible thing done wrong in a movie. At least for me it is. Just terrible, I'll never understand how he got these people to star in this crapfest.”
Hahah That’s Uwe for us, Michael Madsen was horrible, maybe its just this movie but even how he talked it was like he was reading the lines. Did you watch the special features where those tools go and have dinner with him? I just wish he’d go away.
That’s all I’m going to say.
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