whatever.
Trevor and I (and some Doug guy) saw G.I. Joe tonight and I feel like I should write something about it.
First off, I knew it wouldn't be great. I knew that since the day I found out they were making a film. As it got closer to being released it got more and more obvious. Seriously, who makes a trailer featuring a Kid Rock song? did people ever actually listen to that jackass?
I know I ranted not long ago about Transformers 2 and that type of movie, but I have to admit, I felt like I had to see this because G.I Joe was a big part of my life as a kid. I love the toys and the cartoons.
The movie as a whole is bad. I don't think anyone can argue that.
The Good:
- A live action Baroness! (BONER CITY)
- Snake eyes is as badass as one would hope.
The bad:
- unnecessary flashbacks/character origins/love stories.
- Accelerator suits. Fuck off.
- just general sloppy editing that makes the film quite a mess.
- One of the most miscast movies I've ever seen. Dennis Quaid is an idiot and Marlon Wayans and Channing Tatum (I think that is his name) have NO place as actors. Good grief, the black dude is too "typical black dude" and the white dude shows about as much emotion as a wooden plank, even when he's yelling. Hard to watch.
If I wanted to go off into fanboy rants (I don't) I would say that the film needed more Cobra Commander with his classic blue hood and less of this "doctor" nonsense. He got cooler near the end and Joseph Gordon-Levitt nailed the voice, but since it is the "rise of Cobra" I guess I have to wait for a shitty sequel to see him be truly evil?
LAME
First off, I knew it wouldn't be great. I knew that since the day I found out they were making a film. As it got closer to being released it got more and more obvious. Seriously, who makes a trailer featuring a Kid Rock song? did people ever actually listen to that jackass?
I know I ranted not long ago about Transformers 2 and that type of movie, but I have to admit, I felt like I had to see this because G.I Joe was a big part of my life as a kid. I love the toys and the cartoons.
The movie as a whole is bad. I don't think anyone can argue that.
The Good:
- A live action Baroness! (BONER CITY)
- Snake eyes is as badass as one would hope.
The bad:
- unnecessary flashbacks/character origins/love stories.
- Accelerator suits. Fuck off.
- just general sloppy editing that makes the film quite a mess.
- One of the most miscast movies I've ever seen. Dennis Quaid is an idiot and Marlon Wayans and Channing Tatum (I think that is his name) have NO place as actors. Good grief, the black dude is too "typical black dude" and the white dude shows about as much emotion as a wooden plank, even when he's yelling. Hard to watch.
If I wanted to go off into fanboy rants (I don't) I would say that the film needed more Cobra Commander with his classic blue hood and less of this "doctor" nonsense. He got cooler near the end and Joseph Gordon-Levitt nailed the voice, but since it is the "rise of Cobra" I guess I have to wait for a shitty sequel to see him be truly evil?
LAME
posted by D. at 10:10 p.m.
5 Comments:
That movie sucked on all levels, It was so bad it was funny. Which i guess wasn't that bad i got lots of laughs out of it.
Gi Joe's can suck it!
It was fairly obvious when they decided it wouldn't be pre-screened for movie critics that this would be an abortion left cooling on the slab.
You seriously have to have no faith in the movie you've just spent months producing to come out and say "We don't want anyone to see this. Especially not critics."
Indeed.
At least it's not Transformers 2, though!
in fact, that's what the tag line should have been.
joseph gordon-levitt is a decent actor, i like him. but fuck gi joe
He's one of the best actors acting.
Which makes it even more puzzling why he agreed to be in this film.
G.I. joe is still awesome though so fuck you guys.
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